Positive Parenting

You probably spend much of your time trying to be a good parent, doing whatever you can for your child while balancing the needs and demands of a busy life.

Increasingly, you might be feeling more like a manager – managing a household, managing time, managing a job and managing children’s behaviour. So often today we hear about the high costs of having children. People talk about all the sacrifices they made to have children.

It can be easy to lose sight of what’s important. It’s also easy to get caught up thinking about what you have to do for your child and what you have given up for your child. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Take time out to reflect on the ways your child contributes to your life. After all, children enrich our lives in so many ways.

For example, your children give you:

• unconditional love and admiration just for being you
• trust that you are the strongest, wisest and bravest person in the world
• the chance to be a hero
• the chance to be a child again through sharing in the magic and wonder of their emerging world
• the chance to experience an intensity of emotion and range of strengths and skills that might otherwise have remained hidden from you
• the chance to reflect on your own values, attitudes and assumptions about the world
• the chance to relive the joy and pleasure to be found in children’s play
• the chance to share in their fun and their laughter
• the chance to revisit your own childhood
• the chance to take time out from being a grown-up.
  
  
  

Do you think you should be the perfect parent?


Perhaps you have a vision in your mind of how the prefect parent should be.
In reality the perfect parent doesn't exist. If you talked to someone you see as the perfect parent you would find they are not perfect at all. They are probably try to do the best they can, just like the rest of us.
There is no manual. All children are different. What works in one family doesn't work in another. So give yourself a break.
It's true some people are better at parenting than others. If you feel you have weaknesses, work on them by all means. You can get better in the areas you want to improve in. But you don't have to be perfect. If you can accept this then you will look at your role as a parent in a different way.


Your children don't have to be perfect


Were you the perfect child? No? I thought not. I certainly wasn't.
In the same way you don't have to be the perfect parent, your child doesn't have to be the perfect child.
If you have a friend or family member that always tells you how great their child is, take it with a pinch of salt. Don't be fooled. It may be that their child excels at one or two things. Occasionally there might be a child in your social circle who is good at lots of things. So what? There is no need to compare or judge your child by their standards. Appreciate the talents your own child has.
One of the greatest gifts parents can give themselves is time with their children. Take some time each day to laugh, cry, play, dream, wonder and explore with your child.