How to raise a polite child

In our time poor society, it's all too easy to spoil your children and many modern day parents, especially those who work, do tend to spoil their children. Unfortunately it's sometimes easier for parents to give money than their time. Instead of rewarding your child' good behaviour with a new DVD, or buying the latest toy, go back to basics. 

Please and Thank you

Start with the basics. Saying "please" and "thank you" are fairly new skills to your preschooler, and they take time to learn and become a habit. Begin with this as a first step towards politeness, and move on from there.

Practice what you preach

As you probably know by now, your child is always watching, listening and learning from you - especially when you least expect it. The best way to encourage your preschooler to be polite is to demonstrate good manners yourself. Make sure you say "please" when asking something of your child and thank him when he does nice things for you. Use a polite tone of voice and make eye contact so that your child will learn that there’s more to good manners than using the right words.

Emphasize the positive

Rather than telling him off when he forgets his manners, pour on the praise when he's behaving the way you want him to. Tell him that he seems so grown up when he says "please" and "thank you", and that people appreciate it. While it's disappointing when your child is rude to others, getting angry about it could cause him to resist your efforts to teach considerate behaviour.

Be consistent

As soon as he is saying "please" and "thank you" at home, prompt him to do so with others too. Preschoolers like consistency, and a rule that applies only to certain situations will be confusing and become difficult to enforce.

Give time rather than presents

If you do use gifts as ways to encourage good behaviour or to make up for a late night at the office, try offering your children your time instead of spoiling them - even if it is the promise of it on the weekend when you can actually give it.

New DVDs or computer games offer quick gratification but will never substitute what children really want and need, which is time with their parents. Rather than bringing presents or the promise of them, it would be far better if parents promised to play a game, read a story or plan an outing on the weekend with their children. Children just want some attention.

Good manners go a long way

 

Polite, well behaved, well mannered children are charming children and parents should never underestimate the value that other people put on charming children.

They will make friends easier, have more confidence, interview better and basically just get along with people better. Charming children make charming adults and there certainly aren't enough of those around.

Show them the worth of money

 

If you shower your children with cash without them having to earn it, you're not providing them with the necessary money skills as they grow.

To try and teach them the value of money, it mustn't come too easy. They need to learn how to save for something they really want or to do some work around the house for a bit of extra cash. Child who is given money every time they ask is not going to appreciate hard work and will expect everything in life to be given to them.

Do not spoil your children with food

 

While your children might beg for chocolate and lollies, give in too often and you'll be affecting their mood, body image and performance at school - and no one likes a moody child.

Most children eat far too many sweets, biscuits and cakes, and almost all of these products may contain some type of food colouring, preservative, salt and sugar. Hyperactivity, moodiness, obesity, long term health problems and poor intellectual performance can all be connected to a poor diet.

The easiest way to keep sweet treats in check is by not having them in the house where they can easily be found, and giving them as once-a-week treats instead.

Make sure they get a good night's sleep, every school night

 

While your children might beg to stay up past their bedtime, getting too little sleep will have a detrimental affect on their behaviour and performance at school.

Creating a weekday sleep routine will help create a well-rounded child. From an early age create a bedtime routine, such as bath, a warm drink, story and bed - then, as soon as your children have their bath, their brain will tell them that it is wind down time. Don't fall into the trap of letting children watch TV in bed to go to sleep, because all it will do is activate their visual senses and make it harder for them to sleep.